Saturday, May 10, 2014

Confession: I Might Be A Little Lazy...Sometimes...

We were at the beach this weekend for a wedding and two of our kiddos had pretty major falls. Jaidyn fell off of a picnic table bench right on her head. The sound that was made when her head hit the ground was quite a melon falling on the ground and cracking open. She was apparently fine though. She cried pretty hard for a few minutes and then wanted me to put her down so she could get back up on the bench. Caleb also had a nasty fall that I really expected teeth to be missing afterward. Poor kid...we were heading back to the car from the beach and he stepped off the edge of the sidewalk, lost his balance, and with his towel wrapped around him like a burrito he could't catch himself from falling and his chin met the sidewalk with yet another melon cracking sound. Geez Louise! It's been enough to make me want to somehow strap all three of them in my ergo baby and permanently attach them to myself.
Now let me back up a second and say that I am by no means a "helicopter parent." I very much believe in giving my kids space to learn and explore and kind of figure out things without me hovering over them. Like Miss Frizzle from the Magic School Bus says, "Take chances. Make mistakes. Get messy." I would say that's kind of our mantra. But I'm laying in bed tonite thinking about my kiddos, trying not to worry about them making it to their next birthdays. I know it's a mom thing. Once you have kids you never stop worrying about them.  I don't worry as much about my eldest because she is an overly cautious individual, but my son is very accident prone, and my youngest is a wanderer. I have lost her more than once I hate to admit.
I am mulling through in my head about trusting God for the safety of our children He has blessed us with and trusting our kids with the their own abilities.  But then there's this thought of...what if I am just lazy sometimes? Now, in my defense, taking three young children to the beach or the pool or the playground can be an exhausting task. I'm not complaining. I love taking my children places. I love them being with me. But that doesn't make it any less exhausting. And with each child I have had I am positive I have lost brain cells. My mind just doesn't work the way it used to. I'm thinking it may come back eventually. I'm hoping... So I feel overwhelmingly scatterbrained at times. But am I lazy sometimes? I have to confess that I think I am. I guess this is another one of those balancing acts as a parent...trying to find the balance between me hovering over them and protecting them from every little boo-boo that may come their way and me sitting back and letting them just totally do their own thing.
I know, or I think, this gets easier the older they get. I believe two of the most important things you can teach your child right out of the womb are obedience and self-control. If they can get a grasp on those two things they will be able to handle freedoms and responsibilities a lot easier, they will be able to adapt to new surroundings a lot easier, and they will just be a joy to be around. It takes time and a lot of energy to instill these in them but it is worth it. All that to say, our children are a work in progress. I am a work in progress. I am still learning obedience and self-control. Obedience in things like putting God first in my life, disciplining my children, and being content with what God has given me. Self-control in things like spending, and my thoughts, and my tongue. 
I have no intentions of becoming a "helicopter mom" when my kids get up in the morning, but I am going to work on being a better protector and guide to them. That's my job...or at least two of my jobs. I am going to give my worries for their safety over to God and trust Him because He is our Protector and our Guide, our Jehovah-Raah (The Lord is my Shepherd.) I am going to be thankful for the grace He extends to me in my shortcomings and be gracious to my children in theirs. And maybe I'll go do a few sudoku puzzles in an effort to boost brain cell power. But for now, at 3am...I'm going to bed!

I just love my little family!

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